Change and SSS Aproach

Another new chapter has again come to our lives!  This last week Rob and I made the decision to homeschool Eden, at least through the rest of this year.  There were some struggles and issues happening at school, and after seeking advice from several sources, we made the decision to homeschool Eden.  There are some issues we are working through that mostly just need time, which we won't be able to get at a normal school because of attendance rules.  So, we are off on a new adventure!  I was a bit weary to attempt homeschooling, mainly because I still have 3 younger children at home, including a nursing baby, and both Rob and I are in school as well with our own homework and assignments to get done every week.  But, the more we have gotten into it, the more excited I am!  Once we get the basic schedule figured out, I think we will actually be more organized and get everything done in a better way and feel like we are accomplishing more than we were before.  We have already gotten some supplies, and besides just teaching Eden, we got some simple things for EmmaLee and Isaac, who have never gone to preschool before.  They have really taken to the learning already and are excited for when we sit down for "school"!  Also, I somewhat have it easy, at least for the rest of this year because really Eden is right where she needs to be academically and is very smart.  The rest of this year is more just continuing to practice what she has already learned to become more and more fluent in all of it. 

So, with all this change, learning to find balance is even more important to me!  One technique that was taught in the same class as I have previously quoted from is the SSS Approach.  The SSS stands for Support, Share, and Strategize.

Support Collaboration is key.  Support your spouse or partner on specific household and childcare tasks.  Work as a team on certain issues involving your family and home life and delegate certain responsibilities and tasks in a fair manner.  Tap into skills/qualities you use in your career to help in your family and home life as well.  Discuss work and family life priorities with your spouse/partner and what you both consider these to successfully look like.

Share Delineating a responsibility as completely "yours" or "mine" discourages sharing in tasks and it discourages taking over certain responsibilities when it is necessary at times.  Share in your family tasks even if you decide on who has primary responsibility over that task.  It is necessary for you to make choices and remain flexible each day.  It's OK to feel guilty or feel insecure about your performance as a spouse/partner, parent, or employee.  Everyone experiences these feelings, and you should accept them.  Share your feelings of guilt and stress, as well as your insecurities, with your spouse/partner.

Strategize It's one thing to say you will share in a responsibility; it's another thing to actually do it.  Develop strategies or action plans with your spouse/partner on how you will handle certain responsibilities or regular issues that arise.  Together, write them down and discuss them as a team like you would prepare for a meeting or presentation. 

Take a few minutes now to think about one or two issues that you regularly struggle with, and think of an action plan to involve your spouse/partner using the SSS approach to help you balance these issues more effectively.  Then, sit down to discuss it with your spouse, and modify it together as needed.